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主题 : 王大建:《溪水边的玫瑰》双语再版《译者的话》
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王大建:《溪水边的玫瑰》双语再版《译者的话》

王大建:《溪水边的玫瑰》双语再版《译者的话》


译者的话

王大建

2008年出版以来,冰花的第一本诗集《溪水边的玫瑰》受到了华语读者的广泛好评,也成了她的代表作,诗人甚至因此得到 “情诗皇后” 等美称 ;也有网友出于对冰花诗的喜爱, 主动把其中若干首译成英文, 推介给世界其他读者 。但这些译文都散落在网络上,究竟有多少华人以外的读者读过她的诗,又作如何评论, 却不得而知。

我也曾经译过几首冰花诗作。那时我还不认识冰花,也未曾读过这本诗集, 只是从散落在网上为数不多的几首中,感受到一股清新的风, 激发起我的灵犀。后来我有机会参加了中英双语诗刊《诗殿堂》的创刊工作,不得已翻译了一些当代华语诗人的作品,于是就想,如果有机会翻译冰花的诗就好了,一来可以欣赏完整的诗集,二来可以更好地把这些诗介绍给其他文化背景的读者,想必也会有许多其他国家的读者喜爱冰花的诗作吧。当时只是一厢情愿地臆想,并未认真地考虑怎样把想法付诸实践,甚至认为名家只会用名家,冰花的诗轮不到我来翻译。谁曾想, 诗人不久也成了诗殿堂团队一员。相互熟悉后,才知道原来诗人也早有出版英译诗集的打算,我俩竟一拍即合,于是我们就把中英双语《溪水边的玫瑰》的出版排上了2019年的日程。

我是2018年12月开始着手翻译《溪水边的玫瑰》的,其间因个人事务,中断两个多月。虽然我不是名家,但始终也在探讨翻译的原则,并使之体现在《溪水边的玫瑰》的翻译实践中。我自己时有写诗, 翻译时始终本着自身创作的原则, 力求先彻底消化原作, 理解其深层内涵,并转化成自己的诗意,再用另一语言把这种诗意表现出来; 同时, 我也一贯注重保留原作的韵律, 认为这样才能更好地再现原作的韵律风格。完成这一步后,我就撇开原作,专注于译文本身修辞,力求语句精炼,顿挫有致, 一气呵成。也就是说,译文要念起来像一首诗,而不是排列成组块的散文式解读。我就是这样逐首完成《溪水边的玫瑰》的翻译工作的。之后,再把双语对照一遍,做个别修正,就算彻底完工。我觉得《溪水边的玫瑰》的英译稿算是较好地保留了原作的风貌,只是出于其他考虑,诗人对个别诗歌作了删动。在此我要感谢冰花降大任兼信任于斯人。

其实,要细究起来,译文里仍不乏有待改进之处, 但是那些就留下来让读者和其他译者来校评吧。目前我期望的是,通过英译,让冰花的诗能传到世界上更多诗词爱好者的手中, 同时也期望他们会像众多华语读者那样喜爱冰花的诗。我个人也希望今后能和更多的华人诗人和作家合作,把他们的杰作介绍给不同文化的更多读者。

最后,我和诗人共同感谢华人著名翻译家、诗人徐英才先生和他领军的华人诗学会《诗殿堂》团队,汉英双语《溪水边的玫瑰》的出版得益于他们在海外创造的天时、地利、人和的氛围。


2019817



Translator’s Notes
 By Wang Dajian


Since its publication in 2008, Bing Hua’s firstbook of poetry, Roses By The Stream, has been widely acclaimed among theChinese readers, thus marking the poet’s first major accomplishment. Bin Hua has also beenhonored by the readers with such titles as “Queen of Poems of Love,” etc. Somereaders even, with their fondness for her poems, translated many into English.But most of these translations are merely scattered on the internet; as to whatportion of them has actually reached the readers outside the Chinese circlesand how the poems are received, no one knows.

Ialso did sporadic translations of Bing Hua’s poems. I did not know the poetthen, nor had I seen the collection; I merely read a few of her poems scatteredon the internet and felt as if a freshening breeze from the screen werepampering my heart’s yearns. Later I joined the editors of the Chinese-Englishmagazine, Poetry Hall, and was obliged to translate the poems by otherpoets, when this idea popped up in my mind of translating Bing Hua’s poems oncethere’s a chance, so that I could enjoy the whole collection as well as tomethodically present her poems to readers of other cultures, who may possiblyenjoy Bing Hua’s just as much. That was,then, just a transience in my fleeting daily stream of consciousness, and I hadnever seriously thought of getting it done eventually, but feeling that anhonored writer deserves to find an honored translator, and I would never get mychance. What I did not expect was that Bing Hua also joined the editors of PoetryHall before long! As members of the team, we got to communicate thoughts often.Only then did I learn that Bing Hua had long been thinking of a possible Englishversion of the complete collection, so we struck it up there and then and thepublication of a bilingual edition of Roses By The Stream was placed atthe top of our agenda for 2019.



I started translating in December of 2018. Due tosome personal businesses, there was a two-month pause before it was done. Though not a knowntranslator, I had done some theoretical thinking on the principles oftranslation, so I applied them to translation of Roses By The Stream.From time to time, I write poems of my own, modern or classic, Chinese orEnglish. When I translate poems, I follow the principle that I should recreatepoems as if I were the poets themselves. That is, I first digest the originalpiece as thoroughly, particularly its connotative meanings in depth, andemulate them into my poetic soul before I represent them in a differentlanguage. Meanwhile, I always make sure that the rhyming scheme of thetranslation should best match that of the original to best reflect its rhythmicstyle. As soon as it is done as such, I will put away the original andconcentrate on the rhetoric of the translation: experiment with word choices,delete redundancies, and make sure the language is distilled, coherent, andwith appropriate rhythms. In other words, it should read like a poem, not prosyparaphrase columnized into stanzas. That was how I finished translating each ofthe five chapters of the collection. After that, I juxtaposed the originals andthe translations for a final check out and called it done. I feel the Englishtranslation of Roses By The Stream has pretty much preserved theessential flavors of the original, except that the poet has (due to otherconcerns) removed a few items from the original table of contents. Anyway, hereI would like to express my thanks to Bing Hua herself for her having entrustedme with such a ground-breaking mission.

Acloser look into the translations would reveal that there are still detailsthat might be done better, but I will leave those for the prospective readers aswell as translators to take care of. Atpresent, my big concern is that these translated poems will actually reach thepoetry-lovers of the world, and that they, too, will enjoy these poems withjust as much fondness as the Chinese readers do. I also hope to collaboratewith other Chinese writers and poets so that their fine works may be acclaimedin wider circle of readers of different cultures of the world.


Finally, Bing Hua and I would particularly extend our indebtedness to the renowned translator, poet Mr. Xu Yingcai, and the Poetry Hall staff; the completion of this Chinese-English edition of Roses By The Stream has benefited tremendously from the atmospheric circumstances they have created overseas --time, place, intellect, otherwise.---that converge on its successful publication.



   August 17, 2019



[ 此帖被冰花在04-21-2026 05:09重新编辑 ]
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http://blog.sina.com.cn/m/binghuablog
二句三年得,

一吟双泪流。

知音如不赏,

归卧故山秋。
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